Wishing vs. Hope....Does Change Lie in a Word?

 I wish I could wake up in the morning and not obsess about how I was going to face my day with exercise and food.

I wish that I loved my body the way that it was, so that when change happened I could look at it and go “huh, that’s new” instead of “it’s about time!”

I wish that exercise was always joyful, and that I never had to haul my ass to the gym when I didn’t feel like it.

I wish I didn’t always leave my workout looking like a sweaty mess.

I wish that I had found the strength when I was younger to tell all the people who fed my issues to go to he**, and leave me alone.

I wish that the world wasn’t so focused on appearance, and was MORE focused on how we treat one another.

I wish candy and chips were free food in Weight Watchers instead of fruits and vegetables.

I wish….

But that’s not getting me anywhere, so here’s another approach.

I HOPE that tomorrow when I get up tomorrow I can be a little nicer to myself, and try to give myself a little compassion for where I am in the world at this moment.

I HOPE that in the near future, I will be able to see that even though my body isn’t necessarily at a weight that I love, that it is STRONGER than it has ever been, and that it can achieve so many wonderful things.

I HOPE that when I go to workout tomorrow, that even if I don’t WANT to be there, I will recognize the strength it took to just GO, and that I will find some joy in the fact that the ladies I’m working out with make me laugh a LOT!

I HOPE that when I leave the gym tomorrow all sweaty and gross, that people look at me and think, “Damn….That chick must work her ASS off.”   It’s my sweat, and I EARN it each time I work out.

I HOPE that from this day forward, I can stick up for myself and only allow people in my life who hold me up, rather than break me down.   I deserve that.

I HOPE that I can make a difference, however large or small, in the way that people around me view beauty.   I HOPE that I can help them recognize that beauty comes from being a good and caring person and not just from having a pretty face or model's physique.  

I HOPE…..well…..chips and candy vs. veggies and fruit?   I may not be able to achieve this one, but I HOPE that I can continue to do MY BEST with feeding my body what it needs, and not my negative thoughts with what they THINK they need.

We’ll see.   Hope vs. Wishing.  Maybe changing that one little word can help me move past where I’ve been sitting for a while.  I think I've had a lot of wishes in my life, and some have even come true, but I'm wondering what my prospects might be if I faced each day with a little more hope.