It's MY Journey, and I'm Taking My Time

I’ve thought a lot about my heart lately. It has four chambers.    It pumps blood throughout my body supplying oxygen and nutrients   to my tissues to sustain my life.    In it’s most basic scientific function….it is what keeps me alive. But if you look beyond science to the essence of the heart, it represents to me so much more.   It is where my soul resides.   Where I love.    Where I hurt.   And where MY very being resides.   It’s sounds a little hokey, I know….but it’s what I believe. I have recently had some tough days.    Days where I need to fall back on what I know to be true, that I am a good person who deserves happiness, and love, and compassion…. And what I have realized, is that I think my heart is leaking. Inside my heart, I store not only my love for those in my life, but also my love for myself, and some time ago, I think the chamber that houses my own self compassion and love, has slowly begun to leak away.   It wasn’t damaged, or broken, or stolen

Nobody warned me this would be so hard.    Growing up.    It’s hard. I watch my children change on a daily basis it seems.    One entering high school for the first time tomorrow.    Filled with excitement, and wonder, and terror all at once.    My worry for her is being happy.    Finding her place.    Knowing without a doubt that she is a good person, worthy of love and happiness.    That no matter who is “popular” that she is VALUABLE.     A much more important and powerful adjective. The second….my boy.    Starting 7 th grade.    I have very strong protective feelings for him.    They told us he may not walk, or talk, or thrive.    And he did them all.    He’s smart, and funny, and happy.     I want him to see that his quirkiness is a gift.    That his focus is an asset, and his contribution to this world may not be as an athlete, but he will make great things happen.    He may not be a sports hero, but his life is   a MIRACLE.   We watch them, our children.