Showing posts from January, 2011

Finding my Place in a crowd.

"It's very hard in the beginning to understand that the whole idea is not to beat the other runners. Eventually you learn that the competition is against the little voice inside you that wants you to quit." ~ George Sheehan

My friend Carey sent me this the other day.   I have re-read it every day since she sent it and intend to read it every day for the next 27.   

I remember doing my first 5k.   I was so excited.   It was the 35th year of the Hospital Hill, and I was so proud of myself for doing it.   I wasn't in great shape, and walking 3.12 miles seemed like a huge feat.   I felt just the same facing that race that I do facing the 13.1 miles of the Princess Half.   That was a challenge for my body, just as this half is for me now.  The only difference is in who I have become on the inside in the years since then.

Hospital hill ended up being a really bad experience for me.    When I should have been reveling in the accomplishment, I was wrapped up in the comparison…

Philosophy brought to you by......A FISH!

"Just keep swimming.   Just keep swimming.   Just keep swimming swimming swimming.  What do we do we swim...swim....."  -Dorie from Finding Nemo
This saying is really important to me.   When Andy was having his spinal cord surgery and when he was hospitalized a lot, all he wanted to watch was Nemo.   Over and over again we watched this movie.   In fact, when he is sick to this day...he will ask for it.  He found comfort in it.   And I guess in my own did I.  
When things were hard with him....there was Dorie.   "Just keep swimming......"  When I wanted to give up.... there was Dorie.   It's a pretty profound life lesson if you really stop and think about it.   The only thing we can do is keep moving....Keep plugging through.    Just keep swimming.
That's not to say that we don't have days that are stagnant.   Today was that day for me.   Lots of doubt crept in.   Lots of negativity, and lots of feelings from my past.   I have a name for the voice…

Aloha that you??

I'm lucky. of the luckiest people in the world I think.

See...this week I was able to go ahead and sign up for the race.   I have registered, bought a plane ticket, and booked a hotel.   It's a done deal.   Financial investment made.   I'm excited at the prospect of completing this goal, and being able to do it with some of my best friends and supporters with me in person and in spirit.   I'm lucky.  

I'm lucky because I have really great people in my life who give me the straight poop when I need it.   Jason who said "just freakin' do this!" when I was questioning.   Robin who said "make sure you're making the decisions for yourself."  Johnna who told me "I'd hate to see this goal pass you by."   (and walked 8 miles in the gale force wind and sleet with me.  ha)   Mandy who said from the beginning over a year ago, "you can do this," and who has helped me get stronger and healthier.   My kids, who …

Becoming a year later.

This is my talisman from 2010.   This is what I made to remind myself (and my girls) of what my goal was.   The race.   The finish.   The life.  Being a Princess.

This bracelet isn't fashionable, or expensive.   It didn't come in a fancy box....but it means more to me than a lot of my other possessions.   It is a physical reminder to me of the year I faced, the challenges I overcame, and the progress that I made.   I look at it every day, and it is there to remind me not of what I can't do, but of what I CAN.

I have to be careful at this time of the NEW year, not to make resolutions I can't keep, not to set unattainable goals.   They gyms are filled to the brim with people who are determined that "this will be the year" and the tv is loaded with commercials about diet plans, pills, magic bullets.   It's a time that the media uses to try to get us to focus on how fat, out of shape, and pathetic we've become.  They want us to think that we have to compl…